i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Randomize
