I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
Damn victory sex feels great
Are these your boobs on my camera?
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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