It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
It was confusing and full of hummus
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
