I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
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