So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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