He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
