Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
two words...techno handjob
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
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