Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
