worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
People in love make me want to vomit
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
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