i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Randomize
