Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Randomize
