:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
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