I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
