I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
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