hell yes lets make some ravioli
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
