I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Randomize
