i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
