I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
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