i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Is it penis luge time yet?
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
