shes about as inviting as chlamydia
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
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