There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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