It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
