Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
