I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Randomize
