i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
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