So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
I need a burrito and a hug.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
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