East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
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