Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
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