we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize
