Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
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