fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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