Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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