I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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