"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Randomize
