His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
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