im about as happy as oj after his trial
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
