just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Found the puke drawer
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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