Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Randomize