How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Randomize