Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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