Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
