All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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