Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
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