my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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