she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Are we still banned from the library?
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Randomize
