Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
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