come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize
