ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize
