I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Randomize
