what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
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