Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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